It was a Loneliness
It was a loneliness,
Yet, incomplete.
Something of myself
I could not give.
No struggle?
No last plea?
No desperate
tear
Upon my inner
eye?
I
saw
you,
Profoundly mouthing
your
Chang
ing
im
age.
While
I stood silent,
ineffective;
and watched from fa r a
w a y,
Myself destroy us.
© James Rainsford 2013
Note to readers: Something a little more experimental from me this week. I'll respond to all who visit here and leave a comment. Kind regards to all at dVerse poets. James.
A bit different, but I really enjoyed this--the placement--the start and stop of it--really worked for me
ReplyDeletedang...really cool spacing in this james...and watching yourself destroy us...ugh...almost like an out of body viewing on yourself...and wishing you wouldnt but unable to stop yourself...
ReplyDeleteChang
ReplyDeleteing im
age.
That is very effective. I like your experiment, James!
I like the words flowing and chang/ing down the page ~ So sad it turned out this way ~
ReplyDeleteOh...this was so good. It was like seeing someone self-inflicting wounds. Too bad they had to inflict pain on another in the process.
ReplyDeleteI really liked this whole piece..the effective use of the words and presentation makes the message of loneliness seep into the page. The final line brings sadness.
ReplyDeleteI did this many years ago, destroyed something wonderful - but he forgave me, came back and we got married...
ReplyDeleteAnna :o]
Very cool, James. I like the spacing in this, a good capture.
ReplyDelete